"DEAR PERFECT PERSON..."

Dear Perfect Person;

I am writing you because I know that you wanted me to share with you my problems and some of the things I have been through. You have been telling me to share and don’t worry about it. You tell me to trust you and that I can talk to you. Well, it has been kind of difficult because it’s hard to share my personal failures, dysfunctions and challenges. I am sick and tired of holding things back and I am quite upset that you don’t understand what I have been through with the inability to share those things about myself. So allow me to explain some things right here and now.

One of the reasons I didn’t want to share them was because I didn’t know who you would share my stuff with. It’s not that I was afraid for people to know, but some people can be quite evil when it comes to your messed up life. They will exploit you and your personal business. They use it as a way to elevate themselves and make them look better than others. You see all the social media posts. There are all these people who talk about how other people are so horrible. They take pictures of people in bad outfits, bad hair, doing crazy things and then everyone from the US to Chile weigh in with all these comments that are super awful. Without them even understanding the situation and why things are the way they are, they go all the way in like a panel at a witch hunt. I am not sure I am ready to be a celebrity because of some juicy gossip. People tend to be VERY unforgiving. Have you ever had anyone share something you didn’t want them to share about you? Oh yeah, I forgot. You are perfect. You have never done anything wrong before. My bad.

Another reason why I was unwilling to share my failures, dysfunctions and challenges, is because people tend to assume they know who you are based on those things. I am not my failures. I didn’t sleep around because I was loose or easy or because I was a sex addict. I used to be that way because I wanted someone to love me. It felt good to be in the arms of someone even if it was for a brief moment of what I thought was love. I was starving to be accepted by someone because I could not accept myself. I didn’t like many things about me but when other people would compliment me and want me to do things, it made me feel desired and wanted by someone. You know what that’s like right? Oh yeah. I forgot. You are perfect. What is there to dislike?

It didn’t matter what people wanted. I just wanted love, so I would do anything to keep their love even if that meant letting them have their way with me. I knew I should not have done those things, but my flesh was crying out loud because it wanted to be attended to. How am I supposed to ignore that? It’s like being hungry and your stomach is growling and you still eat nothing. After a while, you start getting pains in your stomach. Have you ever had pains in your stomach because you were hungry? Oh yeah. That’s right. You would never let yourself starve. I forgot that you are perfect.

So remember when you heard I used to talk back to teachers? I wasn’t talking back to the teacher because I just wanted to be rude and ugly. I didn’t want to get a referral. I wasn’t excited about going to sit in the principal’s office to talk to him about my behavior. What you don’t realize is that I lived in a war zone. I was tired of hearing my Mom and Dad argue and fight almost every single day. They would fight about everything and nothing all at the same time. And there I was right in the midst of it all. Then I had to leave home and walk through a drug infested, prostitute and pimp affiliated, gang violence filled neighborhood just to get to the 29 bus line every morning. While waiting for the bus, I had to deal with being asked for my number by people who knew I was a child. Come on! Couldn’t they see I was a minor? Or maybe they didn’t care. When we moved from that neighborhood to a well managed neighborhood, I still had to deal with being bullied at school. I had to deal with being picked on and talked about viciously by mean kids. Then I have to get to class and hear some teacher yell at me about how I was not listening. Really? I’m sure you remember what that was like right? Oh yeah. That’s right. You have always been liked and knew how to get along with people. I forgot you have always been perfect.

One more reason why I can’t share my personal stuff with you is because you criticize those who don’t do everything right. You know, while you’re reading this, you probably are criticizing me for not being more careful with my actions. You are probably saying that I need to think before I talk back. You might even be criticizing my grammar and where the commas are really supposed to go. You are probably even criticizing how I need to trust people more.

Well, I have a hard time trusting perfect people. Perfect people never see their own faults and what they have done wrong. Perfect people are so busy celebrating their victories that they forget, if it wasn’t for their failures, they wouldn’t have any victories.

Say what you want, but I am a victor. I may have failed, but the power is in the fact that I didn’t let the failure stop me from moving forward. I may have fallen, but I got up, dusted myself off and tried again. Nothing beats a failure but a try. I am sure I am going to have some more failures and you know what, I’m okay with that. Jesus was whipped, tortured, beaten like a piñata and then hung on a cross to bleed to death, placed in a tomb and still rose up from the dead to live again. He did all that to show me that there is nothing he can’t bring me out of. I don’t need to be perfect. I just need to trust the perfect one. You can continue being perfect because you will never be able to call yourself by the name God has given me and many others like me. Because I have had failures, dysfunctions and challenges, I know who I am. I know my identity.

Signed, Victory

II Corinthians 12:9-10, ^“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

FREE SLAVES

152 years ago on September 22, 1862, Abraham Lincoln issued the preliminary Emancipation Proclamation and declared that as of January 1, 1863, all slaves in states in rebellion against the Union "shall be then, thenceforward, and forever free.
All those people, by law, had the same rights as every other person in society. Of course we know there were many who were upset about that and did not allow them certain rights and tried to twist the law and do things to show they didn’t deserve to be free. According to those people, “They need to be controlled and contained by us.” Those now unrestricted free agents had the right to do just as other citizens.

Just like those back then, we have rights just like the rest of the citizens in the United States. We have the Freedom of Religion, which guarantees to all Americans the right to practice any religion they choose, or to practice no religion at all.

We have the right to express our ideas and opinions when we speak which is called Freedom of Speech. This freedom guarantees that Americans are free to express their thoughts and ideas about anything. They may talk freely to their friends and neighbors or speak in public to a group of people. 

We have the freedom to express our ideas and opinions in writing which is known as Freedom of the Press.

Another priceless freedom guaranteed by the First Amendment is Freedom of Assembly, or freedom to hold meetings. Americans are free to meet together to discuss problems and to plan their actions.

The Freedom of Petition is the right to ask your government to do something or to refrain from doing something.

The Second Amendment to the Constitution guarantees Americans The Right to Bear Arms which gives us the right to own an armed weapon.

The Fifth Amendment guarantees Americans The Right to Own Private Property. No person may take away anything that we own. Nor can the government seize our land, money, or other forms of property without cause, or without paying for it.

To make doubly sure that Americans should enjoy every right and freedom possible, Amendment Nine was added to the Constitution. This amendment states that the list of rights contained in the Bill of Rights is not complete. There are many other rights that all Americans have and will continue to have even though they are not mentioned in the Bill of Rights. Among them are the following.

1. Freedom to live or travel anywhere in our nation
2. Freedom to work at any job for which we can qualify
3. Freedom to marry and raise a family
4. Freedom to receive a free education in good public schools
5. Freedom to join a political party, a union, and other legal groups

Some people see that they have all these rights and now they want to exhaust them. They go and buy a gun, join any religious group, speaking out saying whatever they want to say, writing and putting out whatever they want to put on display in a book magazine or newspaper. Those rights we now have make those things okay to do. People do many things in this world, just because they can.

We however as Disciples of God, are to live differently. I Peter 2:15-17, ¹⁵ For it is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people. ¹⁶ Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves. (Exercise your freedom by serving God, not by breaking the rules.) ¹⁷ Show proper respect to everyone (Treat everyone you meet with dignity, love the family of believers, fear (respect and reverence) God, honor the emperor (or the government). (NIV)

You want to know how to shut a foolish person up, say nothing but follow God’s way. Make yourself a slave to the Word. That scripture I just mentioned talks about living as a slave of God. Every time I hear the word slave, I think of someone who is bound. In actuality, it is quite the opposite.

¹⁹ The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; ²⁰ idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions ²¹ and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. ²⁴ Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
 
We shouldn’t do things just because we can. This only shows a lack of self control. Ancient philosopher and poet of China “He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.” ― Lao Tzu

 

Where in our lives are we doing things just because we can? We tell our children do as I say not as I do. We tell people, I do stuff because I am grown and because I can. 

I was having a conversation with my daughter last night about her phone. She is 11 years old and loves her iPhone 6 I just got for her. Every time I see her she is typing on it, messaging someone, taking pictures, surfing the internet, listening to music all at the same time, because she can. No problem there because I got the phone for her so she uses it for what it can do. The problem though comes because she is on it when we get in the car, when we are at the table, when we are walking down the street, when people are talking to her and even doing things like washing dishes. I began last night talking to her in the car asking her a question and she answered me, but she was still typing and looking at the screen. I got so mad at her that I snatched the phone from her and told her, “You are on this phone too much! Having this phone is a privilege, not a right. So give people your respect and look at people when you are talking to them. Put the phone down sometimes and show people you care about them by engaging in the conversation.” As I listened to God’s voice while I was talking to her, he dropped something else in my Spirit and it went something like this. “If your mom or I are doing it, it’s wrong as well. If you see us on the phone and we are not giving you the same attention, ask us for our attention and ask us to put the phone down.” I am so sure this made her understand that this applies to everyone and not just because she is a child. I want my kids to understand that being an adult does not mean (like most people grew up believing the lie) that you can do whatever you want to do without any regard to how it is perceived.

So live free, but be a slave to righteousness. As my dear brother Tim often says, “Do right because it’s right to do.”

Yes, the Lord has made us free. That means now we have a responsibility to show the world that just because we can do whatever, doesn’t mean we should.

DISQUALIFIED

It is really disturbing how people are so apt to display other people’s sins. It has been that way for as long as I can remember. I am not saying that people who do wrong should not repent. It is absolutely important that those who offend anyone and offend God should repent and get themselves together. Yet, I have a problem with how people see someone fail or fall and yet instead of loving them, they display their wrong. It is displayed to other people. They will call someone, text someone, put it in a song, take a picture, make posters, post it on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to make sure that person is exposed to EVERYONE!

They even go so far as to say, “God can’t use them. They have done something wrong.” The problem with that statement is that every person God has used has been the most messed up people around.

There are even several well-known international church leaders (whom I will not name out of respect) that have been idolized and put on pedestals as if they can do no wrong. The minute they did one little or even big thing wrong or even appear to do something wrong, there are YouTube videos, pictures on every social media possible and everywhere you go people are talking about it saying, “What a shame.” There is this school of thought that if someone like that does something wrong they should be sat down and never be able to be used by God again. Yes, they say, “They should not be allowed to be used by God again.” Who died and made them the judge, jury and Jesus’ personal assistant?

Even with people who have been mistreated, abused or wronged, there is this school of thought that they are too damaged to be used by God. That can't be further from the truth.

The real truth is, God uses whom he chooses no matter what their issue or issues may be.

Noah was a drunk, yet God used him to build the first unsinkable cruise ship.

Abraham thought he was too old, yet God used him to father not one but many nations.

Isaac was a daydreamer, yet God used him to be the son of promise that would come through Abraham.

Jacob was a liar, yet God used him to bless an entire nation of people that would take on his new name, Israel.

Leah was ugly, but God blesses her with children and favors her to birth praise in the midst of the pain.

Joseph was abused, yet God uses him to show us no matter how low you go his favor is better than friends and finances.

Moses had a stuttering problem, yet God used him to free thousands of people and start the first freedom train from captivity to salvation.

Gideon was afraid, yet God used him and a group of 300 to defeat an army of thousands.

Samson was a selfish and bad example of a leader, yet God used him to judge Israel.

Rahab was a prostitute, yet God used her to hide the Hebrew spies and saved her and her family’s life.

Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, yet God used them at young ages.

David had an affair and was a murderer, yet God used him to defeat a Giant and become a great King.

Elijah was suicidal, yet God used him to perform great miracles.

Jonah ran from God, yet God used him to prophesy and share a message.

Naomi was a widow, yet God used her to guide Ruth and prepare her for marriage.

           

Job went bankrupt, becomes fatherless and loses his health; yet God used him to show faithfulness in the midst of loss.

Peter denied Christ, yet God used him to show faith in God and become a leader in the early Christian Church.

The Disciples fell asleep while praying; yet God used them to spread the Gospel.

Martha worried about everything, yet God used her to show hospitality.

Mary Magdalene had seven demons, yet God healed her and she became a follower.

The Samaritan woman was divorced more than once and was with several men; yet god used her to become a great evangelist.

Lazarus was dead! WOW! But yet God used him to show the world that anything is possible.

Marcus was a thief, a player, a hypocrite, an addict, a smart-mouthed brat, a user, a verbal abuser and a big ole hater. Yet, God has used and is using me to bless the lives of thousands of children through music and to minister in worship. Though I didn’t have an active one, God blessed me to bless my children with the presence and the active role of a saved and loving father and is blessing me to love my wife and be the best husband she has and will ever known.

There are people reading this right now that may have every excuse in the book as to why you feel God cannot use you. Let me tell you, God doesn’t use people because they have met some requirements. Being ready for God to use you is not like filling out a job application or making out a resume. If he were to put up one qualification, it would disqualify everyone that ever lived and those to come.

Your disqualification and your admittance of that, qualifies you to be the one He will use. All God wants is a broken spirit and a contrite heart. Contrite means feeling or expressing remorse or that you are affected by guilt. If you can have that, God can use you.

And don’t think because you don’t sing, preach, usher, announce, run the offering, help with communion, assist with baptism, cook the chicken dinners or help with childcare in the nursery that God isn’t using you. God uses people to change the world in ways that some of us may miss.

Now remember the names of the people I shared in the beginning? Did you not know that several of them are directly connected?

Abraham thought he was too old to have kids, yet God used him to father not one but many nations. Abraham had a son that God tested him with by telling him to take his only son up to the mountain and sacrifice him. He didn’t do it because God would bring the promise through Abraham’s son Isaac who was a daydreamer, yet God used him to be the son of promise. Out of Isaac would come Jacob.

Jacob was a liar who cheated and stole his brothers’ birthright, yet God used him to bless an entire nation of people that would take on his new name, Israel. Jacob loved Rachel whom he did marry after over a decade of being tricked and years of waiting. He was first given Leah who was ugly. Leah wanted him to love her so she has children and named them by what her feelings were at the time because she wanted Jacob to love her. Her first was Ruben meaning misery (as she felt miserable because her husband didn’t love her). Her second was Ruben meaning hearing (God had heard her cry). Her third was named Levi meaning join (she wanted her husband to become attached to her). When she had the fourth child something unique happened. She named him Judah meaning “This time I will praise the Lord.” And she stopped having children after that.

Joseph (the one that God gave so much favor to in jail and with the Pharaoh) was abused by some of his brothers who by the way were jealous because he was the first born of Jacob from the woman he loved the most, Rachel. They were a blended family. But get this; remember misery (I mean Ruben)? It was Ruben (I mean misery) who delivered Joseph out of the hands of the others who attacked him. Ruben had him put in a pit. And it was Leah’s praise (I mean Judah) that pulled him out of the pit.

Never think your presence or the work you do, as small as it may seem, is not important. Somewhere, somebody is smiling and having a better life because you are or have been a part of it, with your flaws, disqualifications and all.